i was going to post complaining about the lack of lifeloveandmasstransit worthy things happening in my life. but then i remember the last time it was worthy, i almost got stabbed.
post-worthy things will happen again when they're ready. i just have to be patient.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Thursday, February 9, 2012
are we there yet?
i apologize for the lack of humor as of late. i've been shaken up pretty badly by my encounter with the crazy that followed me home. i close my eyes and all i can see are those crazy eyes coming at me.
the picture for this guy doesn't tell very much. i started taking a new bus (same route, different time) and it's pretty clear that they know this man. i don't feel threatened by him. he seems to mentally deficient in his own right. large puffy orange jacket.. loves to talk. and above all, loves to pull peoples head phones out of their ears to wish them a good morning, bid them a good day, and ask 'are we there yet?'
this morning he is sitting up by the bus driver. we're in the midst of some stop and go traffic and i can hear him saying, "oh you shouldn't go now," "ok, accelerate, GO!" everytime we have to move forward or stop.
i think my favorite part of the conversation is hearing him say to the bus driver? "are we going to die? we ARE going to die. MR. BUSDRIVER... y'know how we're gonna die?!"
-insert long pause-
"no. how are we going to die?"
-another long pause-
..
....
"BALLS. death by balls."
and then he got off the bus.
the picture for this guy doesn't tell very much. i started taking a new bus (same route, different time) and it's pretty clear that they know this man. i don't feel threatened by him. he seems to mentally deficient in his own right. large puffy orange jacket.. loves to talk. and above all, loves to pull peoples head phones out of their ears to wish them a good morning, bid them a good day, and ask 'are we there yet?'
this morning he is sitting up by the bus driver. we're in the midst of some stop and go traffic and i can hear him saying, "oh you shouldn't go now," "ok, accelerate, GO!" everytime we have to move forward or stop.
i think my favorite part of the conversation is hearing him say to the bus driver? "are we going to die? we ARE going to die. MR. BUSDRIVER... y'know how we're gonna die?!"
-insert long pause-
"no. how are we going to die?"
-another long pause-
..
....
"BALLS. death by balls."
and then he got off the bus.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Monday, February 6, 2012
hatelifeandmasstransit
(let me start by apologizing for the zero pictures included with this update. it was not safe to take them)
today started like any other day. in fact, the ride in to downtown was really mellow. after work.. instead of heading home, i headed further downtown for my acupuncturist. typically, i walk (roughly 1 mile) to the acupuncture office. i encounter many oddballs along the way as third ave is one big bus stop. BUT, i've never had problems with anyone or felt threatened. I should have known that something would go wrong. i didn't see one single weirdo during my walk. it was very dissatisfying. i got done with my appointment at about 7:15. instead of having jay pick me up as usual.. i decided to bus home. i got lost for a few minutes, as i had never been to this particular bus stop before. even though i was downtown, the second and lenora bus stop feels out of the way. remote. it would have been desolate had it not been for the man mumbling to himself and occasionally punching the bus stop sign. this, i thought i could handle. i looked at one bus away and realized that i would be waiting for the bus for at least 30 minutes. i called jay. i was explaining my tardiness and talking about the bus schedule when a lone man approached me. i had not previously noticed he was there. i honestly didn't know he was there until he popped up less than a foot from me screaming, "DON'T YOU FUCKING TALK ABOUT ME!!!" i stared at him, bewildered. what could possibly have given this man the impression that i was speaking about him? i hadn't even made eye contact with him until he was screaming at me. i looked at him confused and said, "HUH? i'm..i'm not speaking about you?" he stepped closer as if he was going to grab me and repeated, "I TOLD YOU NOT TO FUCKING TALK ABOUT ME!!!"
at this point jay realized something was wrong as he was still listening on the other end of the line. he asked if i could move to a safer location. i didn't know where I was going but i figured if I started walking down second ave, i could find a route that would take me home. i walked fast, slightly panicking. I arrived at the next stop a few blocks over. it was well lit, there were lots of people.. and for a minute i felt safe again. and then i looked at the available routes sign. i was on the same street but none of the buses would take me where i needed to go.
i picked up my pace and started looking for a new stop. in a three block walk I stumbled across a hooker and pimp fighting and an illegal game of ceelo on the sidewalk. i finally arrived at a familiar stop that i knew could get me home. i sat down a few feet from a woman that was clearly doing drugs at the bus stop. we both knew that she knew that i knew exactly what she was doing. heroin, really? isn't that for behind closed doors? i figured, as long as she's hurting herself and not me.. I'll be fine. suddenly a drunk woman approached and sat on me. i pushed her a little and managed to get her off of me and a few inches over (there was an entire bench next to me. i'm not sure why she chose to sit where i clearly was.)
i thought to myself: it's just 20 minutes. what else could possibly happen?!
and then the man that threatened me suddenly popped up, eating fried chicken and pacing back and forth in front of me. i was very far from our original altercation. how did he find me? i hadn't noticed him following me. i tried to pretend i didn't know he was there. that is, until he stopped directly in front of me and started waving his hands in my face. i took out my headphones. he says, "i'm sorry about earlier. i'm sorry i yelled." and for a moment, he looked sad. lonely. apologetic. "it's just been a bad four or five days," he continued. suddenly, his face contorted and he had this psychotic look in his eyes again. "actually, it's been a bad 45 years." at this point, he looked like he was going to rip my face off again. i could feel the uneasiness rising in my chest. i suddenly felt as if i was in a very small room closing in around me. he continued to hover around me.
my bus arrived. i thought to myself, 'finally the end is near.' and then.. he followed me onto my bus. at first, he sat a few seats in front of me, watching me. it took everything in me not to burst into tears. tears were welling in my eyes. naturally, it had to be the smallest bus available. suddenly, he decided three rows in front of me wasn't enough and he moved to the seat across from me, continuing to stare with these maniacal eyes. i told jay to meet me at the bus stop. i was so freaked out at this point, i could feel the guy plotting my death in his head. he continued to stare the rest of the ride. i wasn't even sure that i would make it off the bus without being attacked.
as my stop approached, i wasn't sure what was going to happen. and just as nonsensically as he started harassing and following me.. he simply gave me a crazy look as I got off the bus and let me be. this guy srsly just wanted to mindfuck me.. and that he successfully did.
i'm still paranoid that he figured out where i live and is waiting outside. in all my eight months of mass transit, i've never been scared for my life like that.
i will be getting myself some protection. tonight is just a reminder that it's not all fun and games.. there is hatelifeandmasstransit, too.
today started like any other day. in fact, the ride in to downtown was really mellow. after work.. instead of heading home, i headed further downtown for my acupuncturist. typically, i walk (roughly 1 mile) to the acupuncture office. i encounter many oddballs along the way as third ave is one big bus stop. BUT, i've never had problems with anyone or felt threatened. I should have known that something would go wrong. i didn't see one single weirdo during my walk. it was very dissatisfying. i got done with my appointment at about 7:15. instead of having jay pick me up as usual.. i decided to bus home. i got lost for a few minutes, as i had never been to this particular bus stop before. even though i was downtown, the second and lenora bus stop feels out of the way. remote. it would have been desolate had it not been for the man mumbling to himself and occasionally punching the bus stop sign. this, i thought i could handle. i looked at one bus away and realized that i would be waiting for the bus for at least 30 minutes. i called jay. i was explaining my tardiness and talking about the bus schedule when a lone man approached me. i had not previously noticed he was there. i honestly didn't know he was there until he popped up less than a foot from me screaming, "DON'T YOU FUCKING TALK ABOUT ME!!!" i stared at him, bewildered. what could possibly have given this man the impression that i was speaking about him? i hadn't even made eye contact with him until he was screaming at me. i looked at him confused and said, "HUH? i'm..i'm not speaking about you?" he stepped closer as if he was going to grab me and repeated, "I TOLD YOU NOT TO FUCKING TALK ABOUT ME!!!"
at this point jay realized something was wrong as he was still listening on the other end of the line. he asked if i could move to a safer location. i didn't know where I was going but i figured if I started walking down second ave, i could find a route that would take me home. i walked fast, slightly panicking. I arrived at the next stop a few blocks over. it was well lit, there were lots of people.. and for a minute i felt safe again. and then i looked at the available routes sign. i was on the same street but none of the buses would take me where i needed to go.
i picked up my pace and started looking for a new stop. in a three block walk I stumbled across a hooker and pimp fighting and an illegal game of ceelo on the sidewalk. i finally arrived at a familiar stop that i knew could get me home. i sat down a few feet from a woman that was clearly doing drugs at the bus stop. we both knew that she knew that i knew exactly what she was doing. heroin, really? isn't that for behind closed doors? i figured, as long as she's hurting herself and not me.. I'll be fine. suddenly a drunk woman approached and sat on me. i pushed her a little and managed to get her off of me and a few inches over (there was an entire bench next to me. i'm not sure why she chose to sit where i clearly was.)
i thought to myself: it's just 20 minutes. what else could possibly happen?!
and then the man that threatened me suddenly popped up, eating fried chicken and pacing back and forth in front of me. i was very far from our original altercation. how did he find me? i hadn't noticed him following me. i tried to pretend i didn't know he was there. that is, until he stopped directly in front of me and started waving his hands in my face. i took out my headphones. he says, "i'm sorry about earlier. i'm sorry i yelled." and for a moment, he looked sad. lonely. apologetic. "it's just been a bad four or five days," he continued. suddenly, his face contorted and he had this psychotic look in his eyes again. "actually, it's been a bad 45 years." at this point, he looked like he was going to rip my face off again. i could feel the uneasiness rising in my chest. i suddenly felt as if i was in a very small room closing in around me. he continued to hover around me.
my bus arrived. i thought to myself, 'finally the end is near.' and then.. he followed me onto my bus. at first, he sat a few seats in front of me, watching me. it took everything in me not to burst into tears. tears were welling in my eyes. naturally, it had to be the smallest bus available. suddenly, he decided three rows in front of me wasn't enough and he moved to the seat across from me, continuing to stare with these maniacal eyes. i told jay to meet me at the bus stop. i was so freaked out at this point, i could feel the guy plotting my death in his head. he continued to stare the rest of the ride. i wasn't even sure that i would make it off the bus without being attacked.
as my stop approached, i wasn't sure what was going to happen. and just as nonsensically as he started harassing and following me.. he simply gave me a crazy look as I got off the bus and let me be. this guy srsly just wanted to mindfuck me.. and that he successfully did.
i'm still paranoid that he figured out where i live and is waiting outside. in all my eight months of mass transit, i've never been scared for my life like that.
i will be getting myself some protection. tonight is just a reminder that it's not all fun and games.. there is hatelifeandmasstransit, too.
shoe optional?
it's not like she couldn't afford shoes. i saw shoes in that giant bag she's carrying. yet she felt compelled to walk around the wet, muddy bus in those slipper socks. she then propped her lil tootsies up right next to my face. i only got the opportunity to take this when a seat opened up and I could move out of foot funk whiffing range.
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Friday, February 3, 2012
hey bebe, i'm real good at guitar lickin'
i actually run into this guy pretty often. the day this photo was taken, he was carrying around a mini-amp and a guitar and rocking out. but he LOVES to talk on the bus all about how the dispensary in georgetown will cure all of my ailments, no questions asked!
pardon me, do you have any spare water? what about meth?
i'm not even sure where to start with this bad boy. i wish i had more pictures to reflect the severity of the situation.
a couple of things to keep in mind: the bus was packed the day she did this. people were standing instead of attempting to share space with her. (i was obvs one of the lucky ones) also: she had a pretty decent quarter sleeve but absolutely no teeth in her upper jaw. (PRIORITIES, am i right?)
she spent a lot of time sleeping in various positions. she dropped her water at one point, woke up, took a look at me and said in 100% seriousness: "do you have any spare water?" she was REAL chatty when she came to. pulled out her guitar to serenade us all. took out a q-tip and lovingly cleaned under the strings. and when that wasn't enough, she started pulling her shirt over her head to use it to clean her guitar. at one point, the bus saw all her goodies. ALL of them. unfortunately, i wasn't quick enough to the draw on that photo. she told me she was taking the guitar to her x-husbands to rock out on his lawn and make him jealous. apparently, he had pawned his for meth (her words, not mine. i would have assumed the same anyway)
much to her chagrin, she left her meth on the bus. again, not joking. and as the bus moved on to the next stop, i looked back to see her flailing and screaming in the distance.
my heart still weeps for her loss.
this spare water is for you, momma.
PS: this all transpired in under 25 minutes.
a couple of things to keep in mind: the bus was packed the day she did this. people were standing instead of attempting to share space with her. (i was obvs one of the lucky ones) also: she had a pretty decent quarter sleeve but absolutely no teeth in her upper jaw. (PRIORITIES, am i right?)
she spent a lot of time sleeping in various positions. she dropped her water at one point, woke up, took a look at me and said in 100% seriousness: "do you have any spare water?" she was REAL chatty when she came to. pulled out her guitar to serenade us all. took out a q-tip and lovingly cleaned under the strings. and when that wasn't enough, she started pulling her shirt over her head to use it to clean her guitar. at one point, the bus saw all her goodies. ALL of them. unfortunately, i wasn't quick enough to the draw on that photo. she told me she was taking the guitar to her x-husbands to rock out on his lawn and make him jealous. apparently, he had pawned his for meth (her words, not mine. i would have assumed the same anyway)
much to her chagrin, she left her meth on the bus. again, not joking. and as the bus moved on to the next stop, i looked back to see her flailing and screaming in the distance.
my heart still weeps for her loss.
this spare water is for you, momma.
PS: this all transpired in under 25 minutes.
got five on it? nah, just $2.50 for the bus... ok. maybe a giant blunt, too.
don't get me wrong. i'm all for making your own choices. get high. get fucked. i don't care. but suddenly, at 745 in the AM i find myself providing free babysitting services to you for your daughter. meanwhile, you're rubbing it in everyones face that you're a shitty parent and you don't share.
way to set an example, player. maybe next time you could be a little more discreet? leave your daughter at home? give people the option to smoke it with you instead of forcing them into contact highs from the fumes permeating from your corner of the bus?
na'mean?
way to set an example, player. maybe next time you could be a little more discreet? leave your daughter at home? give people the option to smoke it with you instead of forcing them into contact highs from the fumes permeating from your corner of the bus?
na'mean?
Thursday, February 2, 2012
fur balls of fury
i know what you're thinking. a-- what's so special about this photo? clearly, you're not looking hard enough. like one of those pictures that you stare at until dots magically manifest into a schooner (not a sailboat!) this beauty will take true form right before your eyes.
you: a sad lonely woman on the bus. large box companion. (dare I mention the entire box is FILLED with cat hair?!) make-shift mini loom. obviously you've picked up the newest edition of crafting with cat hair. (SEE:crafting with cat hair) flaunting your new found skills in front of the rest of us. it's obvious this hair is special to you as we spent an hour watching you lovingly work the cat hair into an extravagant yarn of sorts)i spent that hour trying not to vomit on myself. and to thank you, i am sharing you with the internet. you may not be the best photo, but you are the beginning of my adventures in mass transit. my friends say i can't get a car. thanks to you...i finally realize they may be right.
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